Hero Costumes: Fad or Fiction?

By Abraxis Smith, Paragon City Tattler

TALOS ISLAND - The public's obsession with hero fashion in Paragon City is nothing new. But is a different costume always a change for the better?

When heroes first began to appear in Paragon City shortly after the Rikti invasion, costumes were often a basic affair -- a simple leotard tucked into functional boots with an old table cloth for a cape. Many have evolved their looks over time, reflecting the changing taste of the public or the hero.

"That was before I arrived on the scene, darling," sniffed Jacques, a tailor and costume designer for the ICON chain of hero costume stores. "Heroes have never looked better."

And it's true. Citizens today witness all sorts of colorful and expressive costumes, capes and accessories. Today's costume theme? Showing off the incredible shape a hero is in. Fighting crime seems to pay off in hard bodies, cut abs and tight ends.

Or has it? A recent costume redesign by Jacques for Power, Incorporated supergroup member Kitten with a Whip demonstrates why costume design leaves little room for error. Images captured recently by the Paragon City sewer system security camera (see right) confirm months of rumors that Kitten's quest to complete her cape academy training had resulted in unsightly weight gain.

"We did the best we could!" Jacques snapped defensively. "Just look at her, darling. Weight has always been a monkey on her back, but now she's got a racoon on her shoulder! I pleaded with her -- begged her -- but she would not listen. So the rodent stays, ma chere. And I most definitely refuse to be blamed for the periwinkle blue Ugg boots -- those are all Kitten, mon dieu."

So what do our heroes think? This reporter recently met with one of our more well-known supers to ask first hand: "Do tomorrow's heroes believe their costumes send the wrong message to Paragon City's youth of today?"

"I am so tired of that question," laments Dora Dementia, one of Galaxy City's more, uh, ample heroes. "Kids today are far more obsessed with my body shape than I am. Don't they know it's their deeds that count, not their size? You heard what happened to that sweet little Accupunture hero that died recently? She may have been a hero, but a building fell on her -- an entire building! All that dieting didn't save her skinny ass from the Clockwork that day, lemme tell ya. Listen sweetie -- I’m just out here fighting crime...and mental illness!”

Requests for interviews were not returned by representatives of Power, Incorporated and Kitten with a Whip before press deadline. Part two of this series of articles forthcoming.